Your engagement was special. Perhaps the big moment was pre-determined for months, and the execution was well-timed and flawless. Or maybe it was whimsical and capitalized on the right timing. Regardless of the build-up, the result is what mattered most—a man got on one knee, stared into a woman’s eyes and asked her a life-altering question.
Oh, and there was another key part, too—the ring.
The presentation of the ring is the take-your-breath-away instant when everything changes. The ring symbolizes the promise: The altar is coming, and I will give you my life forever. In the days and weeks that precede a wedding, the magnitude of this promise grows until the couple is finally hand-in-hand to pronounce their commitment, again symbolized by a ring: I am giving my life to you, and only you, forever.
This is the essence of marriage. Two people lay down their individual lives to become “one” (Genesis 2:24), embracing a promise of forever.
A common thematic thread is interwoven throughout the Old Testament to the people of Israel. God promised a Savior (the Messiah or “Chosen One”) to redeem and save them (Genesis 3:15; Isaiah 53:15). Everything that happened from the days of the spiritual fathers such as Abraham and Moses to the major prophets of Isaiah and Jeremiah all foreshadowed this Greater Promise.
Though he was 99 years old and his wife was childless, Abraham received an impossible promise from God: “I will make you extremely fruitful and will make nations and kings come from you. I will confirm my covenant that is between me and you and your future offspring throughout their generations. It is a permanent covenant to be your God and the God of your offspring after you” (Genesis 17:6–7). From this promise, God launched an incredible journey using ordinary people to fulfill the extraordinary promise of the Messiah.
This Messianic promise was ultimately fulfilled when God sent His only Son, Jesus Christ, into the world. Early in His earthly ministry, Jesus stood in the synagogue to read from the prophet Isaiah. “The Spirit of Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim release to the captives and recovery of sight to the blind, to set free the oppressed, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor. [Jesus] then rolled up the scroll, gave it back to the attendant, and sat down.And the eyes of everyone in the synagogue were fixed on him. He began by saying to them, ‘Today as you listen, this Scripture has been fulfilled’”(Luke 4:18–21). In this jaw-dropping moment, Jesus announced Himself as the fulfillment of the Greater Promise. Jesus went on to live a perfect, sinless life, yet he suffered a horrific death by crucifixion on a cross to atone for the world’s sins. Three days after being placed in a tomb, Jesus resurrected from the dead to conquer sin and death.
God’s love displayed through the sacrifice of Jesus ushers in another promise: eternal life. Through Jesus, anyone who places their faith and trust in His sacrifice on their behalf will be saved from their sins and enter a never-ending relationship with God (Ephesians 2:8). Everything changes the moment someone turns to Jesus for salvation.
Do you see the connection to marriage?
It’s the “I am giving my life to you, and only you, forever” statement all over again. These are Jesus’ words to you – and they can be your words back to Him.
How often does your marriage reflect this Greater Promise?
When you and your spouse swore eternal faithfulness, it needed to lead to more. Any promise to always make the other person happy falls flat. You know it’s impossible. With eternally hungry hearts, earthly fulfillment is elusive. Many coaches and spouses spend their lives chasing transitory things like money, fame, championships, or another person.
Consider Jesus’ example: “Christ loved the church and gave himself for her to make her holy, cleansing her with the washing of water by the word.He did this to present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or anything like that, but holy and blameless. In the same way, husbands are to love their wives ...” (Ephesians 5:25–28, emphasis added). Jesus washed away your sin and is preparing you for the fulfillment of the Greater Promise—an eternity spent with Him.
Consider what marriage would look like in the same way—a husband and wife living each day considering eternity, preparing for the Greater Promise of His return.
How would things change in:
How you spend your time
How you treat one another
The way you handle your finances
How you raise your kids
Your journey as a disciple of Jesus